Well I am back home.......and I am glad to be back here somewhat. Houston made it through Hurricane Rita ....it missed us ....it was supposed to be a direct hit to Galveston but at the last minute it took a Northwest turn towards Port Arthur, Texas and Beaumont, Texas and parts of Louisiana. We still got hurricane force winds ....but nothing like was predicted a few days before ....in my part of town the winds got up to around 50-75 mph .......enough to do some minor damage and knock out electricity but that is all. I feel really lucky that Hurricane Rita didn't hit us directly ...especially when I look at what she did to other parts of Texas and parts of Louisiana. The worst damage done to my apartment property was alot of limbs and a few downed trees ....and our electricity went out due to the wind and blown transformers. Well the storm came through on early Saturday Morning ....2:30 a.m CST.....and by 9:00 a.m CST it was over but still windy with some rain but nothing much and nothing that this part of Texas can't handle either. I came home to no electricity so my family and I went to a friend's house ....but by Sunday 9 a.m our electric was turned back on which is the quickest ever after a strom hits around here ....but then just our luck our air conditioner decides to go on the fritz .....and because everyone thought this hurricane was hitting us directly .....the managment and emergency maintance guys all evacuated and were not on the property all weekend ...so needless to say we are in the heat and still are as I write this .....but we have been through worse so we are surviving with lots of fans ....and lots of drinking water to keep hydrated. Today the maintance guy is supposed to come early this morning and fix it ....at least I am hoping ...because the heat indexes today in the Houston area is supposed to be an all record high of 105-115 degrees......very hot for us this time of year. So that is what is going on in my neck of the woods .....to much stress that is for sure. Having to evacuate ....prepare for all that mess ....and then electricity being out ....then back on quickly only to find out our air conditioner broke ...

As far as diet goes ...I am doing ok for everything that is going on around me. Saturday was the only day that I didn't do well with it .....but getting all points in now....and definatley getting in all of my water because that is all I have been is thirsty with this heat. I got on the scale this morning ....and lost another pound ....not as good as I would like but it's better than gaining anything back. As far as any excercise this weekend ....I didn't do any because of all that was going on but I will get back on track with that this week. I hate getting out of routine because it's just that much harder to get back on track.....but I will get back on track, it is just a matter of time.

As far as my personal life ....well that sucks right now but I am getting through it all....slowly but surely..... I thought things were supposed to get better the older you get ....but it seems the older I get ...the worse things get for me....at least that is how it feels and it's frustrating. I have alot of things to be thankful for ....I have a great family and friends ....but when your not completley happy sometimes that just doesn't seem like enough. There are alot of things lacking in my life right now ....and it's emotinally hard on me right now. I have been looking at my past latley ....trying to figure out where I went wrong in alot of things that concern my life ......and it's frustrating when you can't come up with good enough answers for yourself. For a long time I have blamed myself for alot of things .....but now that I am past that I am trying to figure out the why's and when you can't come up with good answers for yourself then that is a definate problem . 

Today I am going to lunch with my dad .....so I am looking forward to seeing him and having lunch with him. He is worried about me right now because of the emotional state I have been in .....so I know this is why the second lunch this month. I try not to tell my dad much about my life as I used to tell him because I don't want him worrying and stressing over it ....he has already had one heart attack and I don't want him having another one .....that is something that I do worry about when it comes to my dad .....I am not ready to lose him yet .....so of course I worry about his health ....but I am trying not to show it because it just upsets him ......and I rather have him happy with me than upset with me on that point so that is how I keep it.  My dad is open with me on alot of things ....but his health isn't one of them ....so I respect him on that now and I just leave it alone .....although deep down it bothers me and it is always in the back of my mind. My dad has been there for every important milestone in my life ....and he has been there for me with the good times and the bad so I can't imagine him not being there for me one day .....I try not to think of it but I know it's reality and I know one day he will die .....but I don't think about it because it's just something that is painful to think about. There are alot of things that I wish now I would have listened to my dad about .....and there are alot of things that I wish he would have made me listen to him about .....no matter how unhappy it would have made me I wish he would have enforced alot of things with me while growing up......as a teenager I put him through hell ....until he finally gave in to what I wanted ....and at the time I was proud of myself because my dad has about the same stubborn streak as I have ...that is where I get it , and back then I thought that it was great that I broke him and he gave in to me ......but now I look back at that and I get really sad .....and I am not so sure if I could love my kid unconditionally acting the way I did.....or it would be hard to do I guess I should say.